Supermoms Anonymous

Can I really have it all and why would I want to?

Feminism, my way

on July 11, 2010

I never really understand what people mean when they say “the feminist movement.” I mean, I understand we want equal rights, we want to vote and we want equal pay.  But people talk about this vague thing… “the feminist movement.” Do they mean more, like they can bash on men and still expect men to pay for the date?  Some act like women are better than men.

Worse still, MY choices as a woman, a wife and a mother are constantly critiqued by others against this imaginary “feminist movement” yardstick.   When I got pregnant, it never occurred to me that I wouldn’t go back to work when the baby was the prerequisite 6 weeks old. People kept asking me right up until labor started if I was really and truly coming back to work.   I looked at them like they were crazy. I didn’t understand their doubts… until I held that baby.

No, not even then did I get it. But having to drop off that baby boy every morning for someone else to take care of him. Not seeing him for 9, 10, or even 12 hours a day. Listening to the babysitter tell me about my own son and what he could do now… that pretty much told me where I needed to be… at least for now.

When I became a stay-at-home mom, people wanted to know why I was wasting my education. When I went back to work, they wanted to know, why would I take a job outside of my field of study. Why didn’t I go back and finish my grad school degree?  When would I do something with my life?

Now they look at me like I’m crazy when I answer,“I am doing something with my life. The rest can wait…”

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